Author Gail Sonnesso, MS
January 14, 2017
“She was never social” or “he wouldn’t want to do that!” I am sure if you work with families caring for people living with dementia you have heard this response many times especially when you invite the caregiver to bring their loved one to a specialized dementia friendly program.
The caregiver is making this decision without trying the program and everyone loses! The caregiver misses learning what their loved one can still do and enjoy, the program loses out because “numbers” mean funding; and the person living with dementia misses an opportunity to experience being with other folks and participating in meaningful activities!
Maybe a better way to invite folks to a program is to say “their loved one will be engaged”; they will laugh and be more fun to live with!” One wife said to me “that she had her husband back” when he returned from a day at GEM they would have something to talk about over dinner!
Another way to express that people are social might be to say “people need people!” People living with dementia are still people with hopes and desiring lives filled with meaning and purpose. They will benefit by being with others in a dementia friendly environment designed specifically for them.
Families report to me that their loved one doesn’t want to do anything or won’t go out. My question is where do you go when you are out? Maybe it is the way you are asking them? Or maybe where you are asking them to go?
Caring for a person living with dementia who has lost their initiative and self-direction is exhausting for the primary caregiver, your day is not your own! Harmony Café, or an art class will give the person living with dementia a purpose and the caregiver relief or “Respite” from the caregiving role.
So many families who turn down day programs and place their loved ones in long term care report how they “thrive in the home because of ALL THE ACTIVITIES.” Think about it ….. Try a program and your loved one will have the best of both world’s meaningful days and being able to say at home longer!
Gail E. Sonnesso, MS, QDCS
AFA Excellence in Care Specialist
GEM DAY SERVICES, INC.
252-480-3354
www.gemdayservices.org
https://www.facebook.com/TheGemCenter
https://www.facebook.com/obxTheRiffTides/
